Self Development

Discovering my bliss

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For a very Long time I believed that I just wasn’t one of the lucky ones. I didn’t believe that I had the talent, wisdom, upbringing and so on to chase my dreams and live a life of wonder. I truly believed that I was not smart enough, not good enough, not pretty enough, not tall enough, not funny enough, not charismatic enough, not dedicated enough… the list goes on and on.

As it turns out I was one of the lucky ones. I was lucky to come across some incredible people who saw in me what I didn’t see and encouraged me for the first time ever to pursue my dreams, my goals, my ambitions and create my own wonderful life free from my conditioned beliefs of what I could achieve. Problem was I didn’t really know what they were.

Two years ago if you’d asked me what I love doing I wouldn’t know how to answer you. I was way too busy worrying about everyone else in my life and what they wanted to do, what they wanted to achieve and how I could help them do that. I tried to do the “right thing” and tried to progress in my safe and secure job. Truth is that deep down I must have known that I didn’t really want to follow that path. I was the queen of self sabotage when it came to things that really didn’t mean much to me (I mean I got the grown up job wasn’t that enough?).

When I finally realised that all of my “problems” were just the result of my crappy self-image and conditioned beliefs that I’d taken on from people close me I changed. I no longer hated myself for being different from everyone else. I embraced my oddness and now I own my own “special brand of crazy” as I like to call it. This life is mine to create as I wish and I am smart enough, I am good enough, pretty enough, tall enough (I haven’t physically grown I’m still a short 5”4 ½), funny enough, charismatic enough and dedicated enough and everything else that I choose to be.

I’m still figuring out what it is that I want to do in my life and think I’ll always be exploring new ways to be happier and truly live my bliss. I’ve grown so much in the past few years that I hardly recognise myself now. I’m far more confident and outgoing then I’ve ever been, I can actually speak to people I’ve never met before at a normal volume (as opposed to mouse volume) and without going bright red and fumbling over all my words. This blog for me is sort of like medium for me to discover what it is that I truly love and to be able to share it with the world.

One of the best things I’ve done so far was to play the wish game. This utilises the law of attraction and Neuro Linguistic Programming  (NLP) techniques to break through anything that is holding you back from your wishes. The first time I played this game Gary the facilitator set me a task to do when I got home. He had me write down everything that I liked doing down in a big list. Initially it was really tough I only had about 5 things on my list and one of them was “secret one woman dance parties” which let’s be honest really isn’t something to build a new life around. But as I went on in the next few days I managed to build a massive list of all the things I loved, from there I decided to expand on that and created another list of all the things I wanted to do in my life and yet another list of all the places in the world I wanted to see. So effectively I wrote myself a bucket list. I knew that I could do everything on that list and more if I really wanted to but it gave me so many things to aim for and be excited about which was something I’d never experienced before for myself.

Now that I’ve ticked lots of things off my list and added so many more in the process I feel incredible. I still have moments of self-doubt and sometimes I temporarily revert to being every bit that awkward, embarrassed, nervous, quiet person that I once was but now when that happens I just gently remind myself that being like that is just not productive for anyone and if people don’t like the oddball that I am then it’s not really a big deal. What matters is being authentic to who I really am and if other people don’t like it then that’s fine. I’m not on this earth to please everyone as I once thought. I’m here to be me and experience my life as I want to, to share the love I have for the world with the world and live my bliss.

Since starting my journey I’ve discovered that so many people are silently going down a similar path as I was and believe that a wonderful life is just for the select few who are privileged enough to have been born with brilliance and clear goals. The truth is that everyone has their own challenges to face and their own demons to battle. I really hope that through sharing my journey I can inspire other people to really own their own experience and live their bliss by discovering what it is that they truly love.

Namaste,

Jessica.

xx

Please comment or email me if you have any questions or for more information on the wish game.

jessienicole30@hotmail.com

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This is a card from that I picked up during the wish game.

Love is all you need

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All that really matters in this world is love. I don’t necessarily mean romantic love, or love for your family and friends. Just love.

Too many of us try to define love and categorise it in to a specific relationship or even an object. But love is bigger than that. Love is what connects us all.

If you think of any great experience you’ve ever had it’s been because of love. Maybe not at first glance but if you delve deeper you’ll see that it’s just love. Only love.

Love is what drives creativity, it’s what passion is made of, it’s what makes things seem beautiful, it’s what makes us feel compassion, it’s what makes us want to travel and explore, it’s what makes giving so wonderful, it’s what makes us want to be kind, to make others laugh, and makes us crave connection to one another because it just feels so beautiful.

…I love the feeling of the sunshine on my skin…

…I love the sun which feeds us all the nurturing light we need to grow and thrive…

…I love the rain that waters the gardens, feeding the plants, and flows in to the river…

…I love the river. So beautiful. Carrying water and nutrients for miles and miles. Providing food for so many different creatures and making the world greener…

… I love the new relationships I’ve been forming. Getting to know new wonderful and inspiring people from all walks of life and expanding my experience, growing my mind and sharing wisdom and wander….

…I love the old relationships I’ve left behind. I love them for what they’ve taught me, how I’ve needed to change, and the person I’ve become because of them…

…I love the challenges I’ve faced for making me stronger…

…I love love…

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Beauty in Pain

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Recently I’ve experienced the end of a relationship that I treasured. This caused me to experience some intense emotional pain. It did hurt and I was sad for one whole day but then I decided that I wasn’t going to try to push away my emotional pain and I was going to really live this experience and be present with the emotions I was feeling.

I felt so alive! How wonderful it is to know I have such a great capacity to love others, how beautiful it is to have emotional connections to each other and the world. I feel so blessed to be so in tune with my emotional body and because of that I really have attracted some incredible souls in to my life.

Emotions are powerful, they are life energy in motion, it’s how we know when we’re on the right path and if you really experience them even painful emotions can be truly blissful. Even though I was experiencing this emotional pain I knew that I had made a great decision and that I was on the right path. I had no other reason to believe it I just felt it in my body and in my soul. This sense of knowing and appreciation for the emotional experience then led me to think of all the wonderful things to be grateful for in this instance.

I realised that I had so many wonderful and beautiful supportive relationships in my life. People who truly love me and I love them wholly who were happily there to support me and lift my spirits. It was through this incredibly high vibrational love frequency that I experienced that I was able to make some exceptionally exciting life decisions.

Big things are coming,

Feel it in your soul,

Namaste

Have an attitude of gratitude

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Practicing gratitude can be really powerful. Your thoughts are things. What you focus on manifests so if you’re taking time each day to be grateful for the things you already have in your life then naturally you’ll find more and more things to be grateful for.

Each morning when I wake up I think about the things in my life that I’m gateful for. This allows me to start every day on a positive note. I then do the same thing before I go to sleep. No matter what is going on in your life you can always think of something to be grateful for.

In the morning i’ll usually think of things I’m doing that day to be grateful for. For example this morning I was grateful that I have a day off to soak in the bath and write blog posts and catch up on my cooking for the week, I was grateful for the friend I was catching up with that day and how much I value their friendship, and I was grateful for having the opportunity to educate others on health and nutrition through a phone consultation that I had scheduled in for the afternoon.

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At night I’ll focus my gratitude on things that happened that day. So tonight I’ll be grateful for being able to share the gift of gratitude with you, I’m grateful for my grandpa for coming to visit and being his silly self, I’m grateful to have wonderful friends and I’m grateful that I’m able to be here for them to speak to when they need me. I’m grateful for the post man for safely delivering me some new books to read. I’m grateful for the knowledge I’ll gain from these books. I’m grateful to the authors of these books for their shared knowledge. I’m grateful for the cuddles I’m about to receive. I’m grateful for a warm bed and I’m grateful for the good nights sleep thats about to come my way.

Some people find it easier to use a gratitude rock. All you need to do is to find a rock, a pebble, or even a crystal. In the morning when you’re getting ready for your day pick up the rock and when you pick it up take a few moments to think of all the things you are grateful for and then put it in your pocket if you touch it throughout the day thing of something you’re grateful for, and when you get home, empty your pockets and hold your stone and think of something to be grateful for.

Namaste,

Jessica

Goal Setting

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We’ve all heard the phrase “failing to plan is planning to fail” before and we all plan things every day, whether it’s what to do with our weekends, a holiday, a business plan etc…

 

Too often we don’t have a plan for our lives. This then can result in feeling stuck in monotony and dreaming of more. That is why it’s so important to set ourself goals that we can work towards.

 

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things” – Albert Einstein

 

This is the model I use to set goals and I’ve found it to be really effective.

  1. Find yourself a goal buddy. This can be anyone! maybe a friend, a family member, a partner, a colleague. Just make sure it’s someone who you’re happy to share your inner most desires with. This is a great thing to do in a group if possible, but most importantly it’s someone to keep you accountable for what you set out to do.
  2. Make a list of things you love doing, things that are important to you (you’re highest values) and just keep writing. write about what you’re ideal life looks like, the kind of people you want in that life, businesses you want to start, the adventures you’ll go on, causes you’ll support, how you’ll contribute to the world and anything else you want to achieve. Get clear with your vision, have fun with it and let it all flow out! Read over it and imagine what it would feel like to achieve all you’ve written.
  3. Once you’re familiar with what you’ve written and you’ve connected with the feelings associated with that break them down into smaller achievable goals with attached dates, start with what you want to have achieved in 3 months, move on to 6 months, 1 year, 3 years and then make sure you dream big and set yourself 10 year goals.
  4. Make sure you write these down somewhere you can see them every day, you can write them on a business card and carry that with you, stick them up on your mirror or next to your bed, I keep a copy of mine on my desktop, on my mirror and on my vision board next to my bed.
  5. Set a clear reminder in your calendar after 3 months is up and review on what you’ve achieved, call up your goal buddy and share with them how far you’ve come. See how your tracking on your 6 month goals and refresh your other goals. Once we start to see what we can achieve in just three months your dreams get bigger and better, keep adding to them and re-connect with your vision. This is how big things are achieved.

If you don’t achieve your goals in your set time frame don’t worry about it. Some things can take a little more time than expected. By taking steps towards achieving these we get a great feeling of achievement and a new vigour for life.

 

“Glory lies in the attempt to reach one’s goal and not in reaching it” – Mahatma Gandhi

 

Good luck with your goals, I wish you all the best. I’d love to hear from you so please comment.

 

Jessica. xxx

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